Elusive.
Yes.
That's what we are.
Always feel free to build on my Head Canons and Ficlets, I ask only that you reblog me so I can go read them. :D
Photoset reblogged from where the sun sails with 50,952 notes
BRITISH VERSION OF THIS:
1. BOIL THE KETTLE - IF YOU HAVE TO USE A STOVE OR MICROWAVE SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOUR HOUSE
2. USE ANY WATER IN EXISTENCE - FUCK FILTERING THAT SHIT YOU DON’T HAVE TIME TO MAKE A PROFILE YOUR SHOW IS BACK ON IN 5 MINUTES PRESS A
3. THROW WHATEVER THE HELL TEABAG YOU HAVE IN THERE - FUCK LOOSE TEA THAT IS FOR WHEN YOU ORDER TEA OUTSIDE
4. USE YOUR STIRRING TEABAG METHOD OF CHOICE, ADD SUGAR/SWEETENER LIKE A BOSS OR NOT IF YOU ARE A HEALTHY BOSS
5. GRUMBLE LIKE A FISHERMAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THE KETTLE AREA TO GO TO THE FRIDGE TO GET MILK AND BACK TO IT AGAIN AFTER YOU ADD IT
6. RUN BACK TO WHATEVER YOU WERE DOING, TAKE A COMFORT SIP AND THEN EITHER FINISH IT OR FORGET ABOUT IT AND MOAN ABOUT THE FACT THAT YOU LET IT GO COLD
****
EDIT: IF YOU CAN’T SPOT IF NOT FROM THIS ALONE THEN THE NATURE OF MY TUMBLR THAT I’M NOT MAKING A DIG AT HER COMIC SIMPLY POINTING OUT HOW LAZY WE ARE OVER HERE WITH TEA THEN GET OFF THE INTERNET. THE COMIC COVERS ALL TEA OPTIONS. COME AT ME BRO.THE AUSTRALIAN VERSION
JUST GET THE BLOODY BILLY ON THE FIRE AND THROW IN A FISTFUL OF TEA FOR EACH BUGGER AFTER THE WATER BOILS
TAKE OFF FIRE
WAIT UNTIL IT REACHES DESIRED STRENGTH
CAPABLE OF SUPPORTING A SPOON STOOD UPRIGHT IN IT IS IDEAL
WHACK BILLY TO ENCOURAGE SINKING OF TEA LEAVES
POUR IT OUT
ADD AS MUCH MILK AND SUGAR AS YOU LIKE OR NOT AT ALL
VEGEMITE IS ACCEPTABLEDRINK IT DOWN WHILE RIDING OFF INTO THE OUTBACK ON YOUR BIG RED KANGAROO ON A SADDLE MADE OF DROPBEAR PELTS, WITH YOUR TRUSTY BRUMBY PACKING ALONG YOUR SWAG AND A DINGO BY YOUR SIDE
CHEERS MATE
CANADIAN VERSION
WHAT IS ENGLAND DOING?
OK NOW COPY THAT SHIT AND JUST CHANGE A FEW THINGS
NO PUSSY REAL “TEAWARE”, WE HAVE NORMAL COFFEE MUGS FOR THAT SHIT.
USE WHATEVER APPLIANCE YOU WANT TO HEAT THE DAMN WATER, YEAH WE SIGNED OUR FUCKING FREEDOM. NO ONE SAID IT WAS MANDATORY FOR KETTLES!
SIT LIKE A CLASSY MAN/WOMAN AND WAIT FOR IT TO BOIL
EAT SOME BACON
THROW A TEABAG IN THERE, LOOSE TEA IS FOR MY MONARCHIST AUNT.
DUMP SO MUCH SUGAR IN IT THAT YOU GET DIABETES AND SO MUCH MILK THAT YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE AND MILK THE COW, BETSY.
TAKE A SIP.
SCALD YOURSELF AND ALMOST DROP MUG, SPILLING IT DOWN THE FRONT OF YOUR BACK IN THE PROCESS.
REALIZE TEA ISN’T TOO MUCH OF YOUR THING AND GO BACK TO COFFEE.
AMERICAN VERSION
FIND A CUP(?) (ANY CLEAN, CUP-LIKE INSTRUMENT WILL WORK)
FILL IT WITH TAP WATER
ADD FIVE SPOONFULS OF INSTANT ICED TEA POWDER
STIR THAT SHIT SO HARD YOU SPILL SOME ON THE COUNTER, LET GO OF THE SPOON SO YOU CAN WATCH IT SPIN
DRINK IT AND CHOKE BECAUSE IT’S TOO SWEET
POUR SOME INTO THE SINK AND ADD WATER IN HOPES THAT IT WILL TASTE ACCEPTABLE
REPEAT UNTIL YOU GET IT RIGHT
ADD ICE CUBES AND A STRAW TO ENHANCE CLASSINESS
FINNISH VERSION
FUCK THE KETTLE, JUST TAKE THE PAIL FROM THE SAUNAIF THE WATER ISN’T BOILING, YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG
TOSS THE BIRCH VIHTA IN THE WATER AND LET IT SEEP FOR A WHILE
GET A BOTTLE OF VODKA
DRINK THE VODKA
FORGET THE “TEA” UNTIL IT COOLS DOWN
RINSE YOUR NAKED BODY WITH THE BIRCH TEA
GO ROLL IN THE SNOW AND SCREAM FOR YOUR ANCIENT GODS
NORWEGIAN VERSION
BOIL WATER IN ELECTRIC KETTLE
TAKE OUT INSTANT COFFEE
DRINK COFFEE
…WHAT DO YOU MEAN “TEA”?
SOUTHERN VERSION
GET A POT AND PUT SOME WATER AND A BUNCH OF TEA BAGS IN THAT SONOFABITCH
BOIL THAT SHIT
PUT THAT SHIT IN A PITCHER
ADD SUGAR
KEEP ADDING SUGAR
NO, YOU’RE NOT DONE YET
WHEN THE SUGAR HAS REACHED ITS SATURATION POINT AND IS NO LONGER ACTUALLY DISSOLVING IN BOILING WATER THEN YOU’RE DONE
(i am not making this up i know people who make it that way)
FILL THE REST OF THAT SHIT UP WITH WATER AND PUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER IN THE ICEBOX
ENJOY THAT SHIT WITH A NICE TASTY PLATE OF DEEP-FRIED THINGS
How To Make Tea. In multiple countries.
YOU’RE WELCOME, TUMBLR.
AHAHAHAHAHA Oh god, so tempted to make one for (Yuppie)California:
Open special tea water purifier you bought at the specialty store.
Get water into the purifier and start prep.
Set up the special glass tea pot for bloom teas or the fancy pot you bought in China Town. Select the tea cups you will use and pre- warm them and the pot a bit to remove chill.
Arrange tea bloom or measure out with the tea scoops the precise amount of tea on the instructions.
Put purified water into the kettle and select the automatic setting for the type of tea you have chosen to brew.
Set out your organic honey and milk you bought at the farmer’s market on the weekend.
Once beeping sounds, pour water carefully into the pot, set timer for brew time and pull out the pre-prepped display plate of organic and/or imported confections.
Once timer goes off, remove the tea strainer and carry tea tray out to serve tea to yourself and potentially a friend or two.
(Because it is TRUE damnit! AHAHAHAHA oh god, seriously, we overdo everything. I got frowned at for not having a kettle with SETTINGS. ahahahaha it has a thermometer, what more do you want?)
Photoset reblogged from speak friend and enter with 9,337 notes
sherlockholmesanddoctorwatson:
Whether or not you ship Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, every Sherlock fan can admit that January 29th is a day to be celebrated. January 29 marks the day that our sweet prince, Mike Stamford, introduced John to Sherlock - therefore I’d like to celebrate just like one would Valentine’s Day.
So I challenge you all to go find your tumblr sweetheart / best friend, send them a message or a fanmail, and ask them to be your Sherlock or John for the day. Simple as that.
Spread the message, spread the love. <3
That’s today for most of Tumblr… ;) Go forth and spread your love to your sweetheart… *waits till midnight to send my own fan letter*
Photo reblogged from MOVED. with 500 notes
OMG all the Robins in a stack of chibis… I lost the ability to can.
Source: ghostei.deviantart.com